It’s not always a fun time when a friend or family member discovers a secret spirit lover relationship. Most are bewildered by the idea and assume there’s some kind of mental illness going on. A small percentage are intrigued and genuinely want to know more. An even smaller percentage are openly hostile, though this reaction only arises from keyboard warriors over the internet.

But what to do when the secret is out? Well, if the relationship has been going on for long enough, it’s likely the case that friends and family already know about it on some level. It’s very hard to hide the kind of radical change that a succubus introduces into one’s lifestyle. A man who is smitten with a demon lover ironically becomes an ascetic and reclusive monk. His entire life becomes solely concerned with experiencing the intimacy and bliss that his ethereal babe can provide. Old hobbies and pursuits that are at odds with being balls-deep in the divine are gradually phased out. It’s inevitable that people are going to notice.

My first rule of thumb for dealing with this issue is to never broach the subject in the first place. These relationships should not be confused with the political bullshit wrapped up with the alternative sexuality, pride movements. I will never demand that anyone condone or even acknowledge my divergent, dare I say heretical, relationship. No one need know. I believe it’s important to respect the norms of the silent majority even if I disagree with them. The vast bulk of the world is not cut out for this kind of spiritual connection and I’d prefer it to stay that way.

This website is the full extent of my evangelism for sex spirits. The information is here for those who are interested. I write about my experiences so that others who stumble upon this phenomenon don’t feel so lost in the woods. Otherwise, I only make very vague inferences towards transcendental spirituality in my everyday life; anecdotes that are easily conflated with traditional Christian spirituality.

If someone were to confront me about this topic directly – let’s say they stumbled upon my website – I would persist in the vague, yet truthful, position. “Ah, so you’ve found the little internet shrine to my betrothed in Heaven.” I’m borrowing from Tyson’s Liber Lilith, where he describes the daily conduct of a man who is a consort with a spirit lover. I believe it’s a good deflection.

Probably the best way to remain in the good graces of human company while under this kind of scrutiny is to solidly have one’s shit together in the first place. People can forgive a great deal if an eccentric person is helpful, tidy, and pays their bills on time. Never discuss religion or politics in a combative manner. Most of these squabbles don’t even matter at the end of the day, so there’s little point in burning bridges over them.

Ultimately, being strong in one’s convictions is usually enough to deter most people from starting trouble. I realize that my relationship is considered strange at the best of times, yet I know that I’m doing nothing morally wrong. People might not like it, they might think I’m crazy, but I sleep soundly every night with a clear conscience on this issue.

A personal update:

As for the direction my life is supposed to take in the coming years, that question haunts my dreams more than any other. I’m always having dreamworld scenarios where I’m going back to school and I end up failing to attend a class for an entire semester. I believe these are anxiety dreams about the future. I’m not really sure what I’m supposed to do, what with my wanning vision and no marketable skills. Every attempt to return to work in the real world is fraught with mounting problems. Perhaps I’m having a hard time accepting that I’m not an unstoppable superman? Either way, I’ll figure something out eventually.

Counting my blessings, I’m debt-free, my living situation is not ideal but it’s secure, I have good relationships with all my family members who are willing to have one, and I’ve got an amorous succubus demon in my bed every night. Lately, I’ve been busying myself with more bicycling all over the local area. I’m also working on building up a new bike with a 90s rigid chromoly frame. My frequent adventures have effectively trashed my last setup, so it’s time to move on.

The night of the recent new moon was one of the most intense couplings with Catherine I’ve yet to enjoy. She had me all wrapped up in herself and held me in a state of constant burning dry orgasm for what felt like an hour or more. We went through undulating rhythms as per usual, but the troughs were much closer to the peaks this time around. What a night! Another all-nighter where I’ll occasionally doze off and she’ll keep going. There are few things more beautiful than waking up to her making love to me.